Our deep seated beliefs influence how our life unfolds, for better or worse. If, deep down we believe that we are unloveable then we will have reactions and take actions that will unfold the destiny that we truly fear right before us; we are creating the very thing that we fear most. We recreate our past traumas because they are familiar, because they feel comfortable; for why would we seek to foster and cultivate love and connection if we’ve only known abandonment and rejection? The incongruence between the belief that we are not worthy of life and the unfolding reality of somebody opening their flower to us, this is unfamiliar, this is uncomfortable.
So, what must we do?
Like all growth, we must confront our fears face on and rise above. We must raise the claymore overhead and proclaim victory; we must take a leap of faith, we must believe that our parachute will open. When someone leans in, lean in with them, don’t pull away. You’re bound to be hurt, but that’s life, pain is certain, but not every time; you will connect, your vulnerability will be matched.
Be open, accept the discomfort, acknowledge the discomfort, do not run.